One of the main reasons I blog publically is because I want to be an encouragement to others…no matter if it is the journey of motherhood or adoption or whatever. Nothing thrills my heart more than when I receive an email from someone who identified with something I said and it was just what they needed to get through their day.
It thrills my heart because I know that God used me that day to speak to someone else. I know it is not my words , but His and there is nothing more satisfying to me.
So, yesterday I started to obsess over the post that I last wrote. I started to worry that a fellow mom in the throes of toddlerhood was thinking, “what is wrong with me? I’m not enjoying this. I look forward to the breaks. I’m not fulfilled.”
Every word I write is true. It is from my heart, at least for that day. I have always done much better speaking my feelings through words than by mouth or even actions. So, I guess I wanted to clarify or even reiterate that while I do love being at home with little ones, it doesn’t mean that every moment is perfect.
It doesn’t mean that I don’t end up in tears over a little boy that poops in his “big boy” pants yet once again.
It doesn’t mean that I don’t sigh audibly loud when a 3 year old comes down from “nap” without sleeping.
It doesn’t mean that my heart warms over the sounds of the constant sibling bickering.
It doesn’t mean that I want to stay forever in the moment of a writhing, screaming and tantrum throwing toddler.
What it does mean…..
Is that the sweet things throughout the day stay with me more than “bad” things….at least I try and choose for them to be.
And it’s that I realize that nothing in this life is perfect. Not a job, a home, a person, a career, a family or a child.
And it’s that everything in this life is somewhat hard….especially our jobs, our home, people, careers, families and children.
So, that is why I love where I am at. It’s not perfect. It’s not easy. But out of all the imperfect places in this world, I would choose no other place than where I am.
And as sad and even intimidated I may be over the future, I realize that the next “imperfect” stage may be even better than now.
11 comments:
Amen, Sister!!
Amazing how fast one can go from snuggling and sweetness to just surviving the afternoon. :)
:) Well said!
How funny that we both changed our blog layouts on the same day!! I know just what you're saying about trying to focus on the good moments at home with the little ones. With SuSu doing so well with preschool, the reality that I might be sending both kiddos to "big school" next fall is looming over me. I know how fast this time will go with our SuSu at home and soon I'll have an "empty nest". I'm trying to savor this time as much as I can, and remember that it will be here and gone before I know it:) Can you imagine how much coffee you and I will drink when all our kids are in school in two years??? We'll need to start a support group.....with donuts, of course.
Oh how I despise when I write a post and then I begin to wonder if I will be misunderstood! I always wonder if it is the enemy whispering doubt or an opportunity to share more of what needs to be said. I think you clarified what you are feeling perfectly ... we know that every day with your 3 year olds is not going to spent cuddling and giggling together ... you are focusing on the positive things and that is the best place to be!
Love the new look!! Enjoy the holiday!
I love your new design!
Love the new look!:)
I always joke with my friends that worry with that same exact thing. I must be either oblivious or just too prideful cause I rarely, if ever, question the things I write :)
I usually figure that it is someone else's fault if they don't get what I was trying to say. I know, probably not the Christ-like response...
Women and mothers like yourself inspire me. I am full of admiration because you are so full of love that you are able to share it with an adopted child and of different race.
You are indeed brave in many aspects.
Remember a mothers life is never really sane.
God Bless.
Beautifully written! Both this post and the last! And both can be identified with! I'm so loving where I'm at too, but you're right - it is a DECISION you have to make. :) Beautiful writing, wonderful post.
great last 2 posts, girl!!!!!
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